I am a 17-year-old girl and I am a Christian. From I was 15 years old I have been masturbating. My pastor preached about masturbation one Sunday and I felt so guilty, because it is something that I do often. When I was 16, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend, but I changed my mind. When I went home, I pleased myself by masturbating. Sometimes at nights, I feel for sex and I go to the bathroom and masturbate, because I am sharing a room with two of my brothers and I don’t want them to know what is going on. I went to camp one summer and we had a discussion about masturbation among ourselves as girls, and when the session came to an end, I talked to the counsellor privately, and I confided in her that I masturbate. I worked up the courage to ask her if she had ever done it. She said that was not the type of question I should ask her. But she said that she would answer me at the end of the camp. I did not forget what she said, so on the last day of the camp I said, “Miss, I have not forgotten that you promised to answer my question,” and she repeated,”That is not a question you should ask me, but my answer to you is yes, but I don’t do it anymore because I am now married.” I have never told anybody what she told me as my camp counsellor. Whenever I masturbate, I feel good and I am relaxed. Is it a sin to masturbate? Some people say so. Would you give me an answer please?
If the truth be told, most people, young and old, masturbate, but it is one of the topics that people do not openly discuss. On the other hand, some Christian counsellors have condemned this practice. Others have restrained from doing so. There was a time when many believed that only males masturbate, but many surveys have shown that women masturbate just as often as men. I have answered letters about masturbation many times. The Bible is silent about this, so as a Christian counsellor I should be silent, too, and be careful not to condemn anyone who masturbates. I have said many times that it is a very difficult habit to break, but the urge to masturbate would become less when people are married and have their partners living with them. However, even then, from time to time people masturbate while their partners are on the same bed and sleeping. Counsellors have told me that even after having sex with their partners, if they feel unsatisfied, they masturbate before falling asleep. You are very brave when you asked your cou nsellor at camp whether she masturbated and she told you she did. I know she wasn’t trying to give you licence, but she was telling you that she was human. Do not condemn yourself because you masturbate, and do not allow anyone to make you feel that you’re not a true Christian because you do. I know that some people would condemn me for the wa y I answered this letter, but I have to be truthful to you.