I am 22 years old and some things have been haunting me. I did not
say it to any body, as I was scared. Well when I was about 9 years old
my father had a friend who came to live with him. He paid me money to
have sex with me. He was a big man at that time, could have been my
father. I had sex with him and he put it (his penis) on top of my vagina
because he was afraid to put it inside me. When he had sex with me he
urinated a little and I thought I was pregnant. For days I kept on crying,
I thought I was pregnant. I didn’t realize that it couldn’t go like
that. About 3 years after that I used to spend holidays with my grandma.
My cousin J and I shared the same grandmother (my mother’s nephew).
He was 2 years older than me. He asked me to have sex with him and I
said yes thinking it would’ve been the same like my father’s friend.
I did not feel any pain at that time so I agreed. I knew it was wrong
but I did. When he put his big cock inside of me I thought he was going
to kill me. That cock was stiff with lots of veins. He was mature with
hair around his pubic area and chest. He fucked until he nearly fuck
the hell out of me. I said “J, I can’t bear it!” He said to
stop the noise, he will take time. He was feeling so sweet although
he nearly fuck me to death. I screamed and my grandmother came and knocked
on the door and said Sheila, and I answered. She asked what’s wrong
and I told her it was the show that was so scary. I had to jump up instantaneously
and get my clothes on. She said Seila, come now, it’s time for bed,
I don’t trust you two.
The next morning it was a lucky thing I woke early. It was pure blood.
It was a pit toilet and I had to throw my underwear in it. My cousin
bought me sausage and I eat it. He bought me lots of things afterwards
but I decided not to have sex with him again. Every time he would try
to influence me to have sex but I said no. No matter what he did. He
gave me a Walkman but I stuck out and said if that’s sex I don’t like
it. People often talk about sex that it’s nice but it’s a lie. It’s
been a long time since I haven’t gone back to my grandmother. She keeps
coming to look for me but I totd her I don’t like where she lives. She
ask why but I said I can’t be bothered with that place. She didn’t know
that I was afraid of my fuckaton cousin.
When I was 16 years I ran away from my father to live with my aunt.
I went to spend the Easter with my grand-aunt-in-law and my grand-uncle.
He tried to touch my breast but I couldn’t believe my eyes so I ignored
it. All now I can’t believe my eyes. It’s like a family sickness to
fuck family. My same grand-uncle son was trying to fuck me but I wouldn’t
agree because now I am 16 years old and I knew it was wrong. His brother
(my cousin) came to me and sjid, “Nick said he like you and if
you would give him a sex.” I was so astonished I jumped up and
said, “You mus be fucking crazy. Yu-a-fuck-an nah wine!” He
said, “Sheila, hear what I have to say, listen to me. I can let
you have a lot of money. Sheila just please listen keenly.” So
he said we should visit Nick house. We arranged for it and on the Sunday
we rode two bicycles and went and looked for him. First
I held his hand and squeezed it. He took me aside and said, “Robert
give you the message?” I said, “Yes. His response was this;
“But you have sense. (That cousin is washed out, it’s a distance
cousin) So what you up to?” He gave me $500. It was like a $3000
at that time. He said, “So when will we fuck?” I said, “Well
about a week time because I am now menstruating.” Nick said it’s
o.k., so we rode off on our way. Robert said, “A duppy dat, fucking
duppy. Mi no tell you say we can have him weak.”
We stopped and we bought chicken (fried & jerk) and liquor. We
celebrated and made ourselves merry. It was so amusing. When we went
home he said to me again, “We nice fi da week ya.” In the
night we have a big laugh. The next morning the guy came calling Robert,
so he had to get up early. This was his response, “A wa do that
fucking brinks, you can want to fuck your family?” Anyway he went
out and spoke with him. Every day he would come and bring chicken, ice-cream,
Supligen- any little thing. Meanwhile his mother was sick, helpless
and hungry. Sometimes I sell it to my cousin or anybody and buy like
cooked rice and chicken or mix the Supligen with carrot and Dragon.
Robert would bring it to the guy mother. Friday came for the bashment;
it was a grand market night. He brought us to grand market in Man-deville
where he bought me clothes, shoes, food and all type of little stuff.
He bought Robert only a piece of jerk chicken and a soda so Robert turned
to him and said, “So you can’t buy me a shoes?” Nick said,
“You have pussy fi fuck?” Robert said, “I’m your smaller
brother, you too fuck up.” Nick said, “You get a piece of
chicken, you should have gotten a bag of ice water. Any time you have
pussy you can open up make me fuck and you will get shoes and all those
things like she.” Robert said, “I would be your sister, would
you fuck me?” He said, “From you have pussy as long as you’re
not my mother, and you are my father’s child. I’m not sure of you, neither
sure if you are a jacket.”
I told him I have one more week as my menstruation was still on. “No,”
he said, “I’m giving you until Sunday evening. If your menstruation
don’t stop I’m fucking still.” I said “No.’ He said, “I
will fuck and suck.” So I said alright because I’d already planned
to leave early Sunday morning. The Saturday night he came talking to
me, saying tomorrow is the day. I said yes and he gave me $1500. After
he left I gave Robert $500 and we laughed. We gave him a piece of chatting.
Robert said, “You see if you didn’t listen to me you wouldn’t have
got so much money and things. He said to me that if him ever try to
dis me I should blackmail him telling him I’m going to buss out everything.
That Saturday night I couldn’t sleep, I was dying for Sunday morning
to come. Why I couldn’t sleep? He was the topic and it’s all about laughing.
The Sunday morning came and I woke up from 4 a.m. and took the bus.
I boarded my flight and flew to my home. Robert and I communicated by
mail. He wrote telling me that Nick vex with him with tears in his eyes
saying look what you have done to your brother not letting me fuck that
fresh, young, fat pussy and mi woulda suck it too. Robert said he told
him he must not love his family, it’s a sin. After that, until Robert
migrated to America he haven’t written me since. I couldn’t believe
he didn’t. From I robbed Nick of his money I haven’t gone back there.
I met my boyfriend Michael and have gotten a son for him. But before
I got a son my neighbour Mark love me off even though he lived with
his woman and children. He used to influence me to have sex but he was
too big and I did not love him. He told me he would suck me and I agreed
having never gotten a chance. He used to give me money, I was so happy
for that. He sucked my breast, which were so brown and pretty. One day
I was sick and he was the only person nearby. He rubbed me down with
alcohol, he even reach down to my pussy. He sucked me and he told me
he wouldn’t fuck v me, he would leave it until I recover from my flu.
During the oral sex I practically wined off his face. When I was cumming
I said, “Mark, I’m no longer sick! Suck until I get better, don’t
stop, suck it, I love it!” Finally I cum and was weak out. He left
and bought some soup. I was so weak I couldn’t hold the spoon. The reason
for my weakness was the cum plus the flu. He fed me the soup.
Back to the part about my son. My boyfriend and I weren’t getting along
well, so I decided to leave him. He ill-treated me and did a lot of
bad things to me. I have to wonder if it’s because I robbed so much
man plus my family why I’m going through all those bad
stuff. I guess not, those men knew they couldn’t get my body, and I
didn’t need them. They don’t have any use for their money. That money
helped me a lot. Sometimes I said I’m going to change but it’s like
robbing is an addiction to me. My baby father and I separated about
1 1/2 years after Mark promised to take me out. He took me to a go-go
club where I enjoyed myself. The owner of the club was his friend and
he told him I was one of his girls. About 1/2 an hour after I wanting
to urinate so his friend took me to the bathroom. He tried to fuck me
and wanted to give me $500. I said, “You think I’m like those sluts,
I guess you fucked them all off? You give one of that gal slut the money,
I don’t need it.” So I went to Mark telling him I was ready. It’s
like he was drunk. On our way he stopped in the middle of the road pulling
up my skirt and started to suqk out my pussy. It was traffic blocking.
I had to hold his locks (he is a rasta). Same time a car man drove up
and said, “Fire fi a suck pussy dread! This was so unreal, di dread
a suck pussy inna di middle a di road! A so pussy sucking sweet? It
look like me have to go try it!” It was a good thing it was 3 a.m.
There were less people on the road.
He then drove to a near by football field. He spread my legs wide apart
and drop down the seat. He even uses his teeth to take off my panty.
He sucked and sucked and he pushed his tongue inside.
I felt so good that I thought I was in a different world. After that
he gave me $1000 and said he wasn’t in any fucking mood. I said you
have to fuck, you can’t just turn me on and leave me like this. So he
sucked my pussy until I discharged about 5 times. Afterwards, I had
to tell the dread these words; “Jah, Selassie, I said to stop.”
My pussy was like Lucifer was pushing a hot fork in it. He stopped and
then he brought me home. In the morning he and his woman kick off saying,
“You fucked a slut in that car, blooding it up!” I felt so
guilty but pretended not to know anything. He had sucked me so hard
that my menstruation came. He came to me asking if I was menstruating.
I said are you fucking crazy? I said you sucked me so hard until blood
came. He laughed and said, “If I drank pussy blood, Jah know a
pussy medicine!” This is a true story.
Initials withheld Hayes, Clarendon
It has to be. Nobody could make all that up!
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