Dear Pastor,

I am a 20-year-old female and I am living with my parents. I have a boyfriend who is two years older than I am, but he lives alone. Sometimes he asks me to do some things that as a Christian, I don’t feel comfortable doing. I have spoken to him concerning my discomfort and whenever I do, he gets upset about it for a while. But then he begins to ask again, as if the topic was never discussed. Whenever I curse him about it, he tells me that he can’t control his hormones. Recently, he asked me if he could visit me when my parents were not at home just to chill with me. But I told him no because I didn’t believe he just wanted to chill and he got upset. What do you think of the situation and what do you think I should do? Do you think as his girlfriend that I am obligated to satisfy his sexual needs?

J.B.

Dear J.B.,

I would suggest that you end the relationship with this young man. He does not love you. He does not desire your highest good. What constantly occupies his mind is having sex with you and according to you, it is not conventional sex. Perhaps he wants to do freaky things so you are quite correct in not allowing him to have his way with you. He is not going to stop harassing you. You are wise not to have allowed him to come to your house when your parents were not there. You are under no obligation to satisfy this man’s sexual needs. Again I say, bring an end to this relationship. As a Christian, the good Lord has a man for you somewhere and in God’s own time you will meet that man.

Pastor